Why can’t togas come back in style?

Why — when you need a specific thing — why is that thing never, ever available?

I speak specifically about a cream 0r brown or blue dress.

Cream is probably never going to happen. Chubby girls should not wear colors that make them look like beluga whales. Just sayin’.

Apparently, no one buys brown dresses in summer, therefore no one makes brown dresses in the summer.

And it can’t be just any blue. It must be the right blue. Probably this is a shade of blue that exists only in my head, never in fabric form.

Additionally, this dress must be just right. It’s for a signing even at the Romance Writers of America national convention in New York City in July.

It would also be nice if I could wear it again to work. I tried on 739 dresses this weekend, and I can say, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that it’s waaaaaay, waaaaaay too hot to be trying on clothes.

Gaaaaaaaaah!