July 17

We were so overwhelmed with trying to get out of work and pack our bags for NYC we didn’t get the opportunity to write the 5 Favorite Things yesterday. Yesterday was a whirlwind. Now we’re sitting in the airport waiting out a two hour flight delay. If there are two people better able to entertain each other in an airport, we don’t know who they are. We have such plans for NY we can barely contain ourselves. We’re considering stealing an airplane. It was pointed out by one of us that we don’t know how to fly a plane, so we figure we’ll drive it. Won’t that be a sight on the freeway? The benefits are many. There’s lots of room and even a bathroom. We’ll have to stop at the Circle K for food, cause we’re not eating that crap they have on the plane. We suspect we’ll find several co-conspirators in the airport. We’ll let you know how it works out. Until then, here’s some funny stuff.

1. Free lunch!! The Sisters went to Chick-fil-A for frozen lemonade and a chicken sandwich at lunch time the other day. If you’ve not had a frozen lemonade there, you’re seriously missing out. Go get one. We’ll wait here. Anyway, we were in the drive through and Amylynn was making fun of the drive through girl. They’re just so chipper; it’s wrong. When we got to the window, the exceedingly nice girl at the front declared she was comping one meal. The Sisters looked at each other in confusion. Was it because she heard us being mean? Then, her voice rising even higher, the clerk informed us she was comping both meals. Why? “It’s cow appreciation day!” she told us. “And you’re wearing black and white.” So what it comes down to is that we got free lunch because we looked like cows.

2. Airline apps. Amylynn downloaded all the apps on her iPhone for the airlines we’re flying. She was able to check in, pay for our bags, and get updates on our flight delays. We’re going Delta to NYC. You may recall there was an issue with Delta several years ago when we went to the RWA convention in Atlanta. This year when we checked in for the flight on the app, it made us  testify that we weren’t bringing any explosives, matches, or Samurai swords. It did NOT mention Hot Hands and we didn’t bring it up. We were anticipating a breeze once we got to the airport since we’d done all the work on the app. But no. The line to check our bags was insane and there was no avoiding it. Hmmmm, the app may not be perfect after all.

3. Javier. While we were trying to get through security we met Javier. He’s a very excited TSA agent. Ava managed to break her driver’s license while checking her bag, and Javier thought this was most interesting. He kept bending it further and further as he explained to us, his captive audience, all the security measures on the Arizona driver’s license. He was like a museum docent with his expansive knowledge of the thing. He thought he was impressing the hell out of us when, in reality, what he was doing was teaching us everything we need to know to make a fake id. Thanks Javier. We’re going to roll over on you first thing when we get caught.

4. Stowaways. Packing for vacation sucks. It’s stressful and you’re always certain you’ve forgotten everything. The one thing that makes it better is all the assistance you get with cats. All of our kitties were in and out of our luggage, attacking each other, leaving kitty hair, and joy every minute. Some times they even “help” by unpacking the things you just put in. The lure of cats to luggage is akin to the siren call of a box on the floor. If we thought we could get away with it, we’d have left one of them in there with some kibble. We’re going to miss them terribly while we’re gone.

5. Locating the airport. We were all excited that we were parking Dave at the airport instead of one of those lots a zillion miles away. We printed a coupon and everything. Turns out, No. SkyHarbor Airport Long Term parking is not on the airport property. We mentioned our disappointment to the lady at the gate. It didn’t appear that she was excited about being at work today. Nor was she happy about dealing with the Sisters. She walked out of her little gate building and pointed over the roof. “The airport is right there.” Apparently she thought we were blind idiots. That mistake has been made before, but no. We’re not blind.