Zero gravity can be funny
As you’ve been made aware of before, the Sisters are none too happy about their current employment. Two of us are floundering away at Bank of No Forks and the third one is trying to make hard decisions about re-entering the torture circus in a big way.
But there is good news. We’ve found our new jobs and we’re really quite excited about it.
NASA is hiring astronauts for the International Space Station. They describe the ideal candidates as having creativity, ambition, and team work. A sense of daring and a probing mind. Oh. My. God. It’s like they’ve been reading this blog! Frankly, we’re surprised they didn’t just come to us directly.
We pulled the listing off USAJOBS .com and we think we could totally handle it. The requirements are not nearly as forbidding as you’d think. There is a height requirement of 62 inches. Amylynn, the shortest of the three, just squeaks by, and there is no weight requirement. Also, they require that your vision be correctable to 20/20 and they’ll pay for the LASIK or PRK. They babble something about “anthropometric” requirements for the “extravehicular activity mobility unit” (space suits ) but, honestly, we’re not too worried because of the next point.
They try really hard to scare you with discussions of “arduous” training that takes 2-3 years so we figure that any issues we may have with the “anthropometric” nonsense should be resolved with this training.
We’ve really thought this through. We figure our husbands will love it because we can’t spend money shopping, unless there is internet in space. You lose weight in space what with that zero gravity business. Sold! Ava has been watching Nova on PBS and she thinks she’s got a pretty good handle on this physics thing. According to her, time moves slower the closer you are to a black hole. For example, two hours at a black hole is equivilant to fifty years on Earth. If we’re at the International Space Station (ISS) then we’re closer to a black hole than we are on Earth, ergo we’ll come back
thinner and younger than when we left.
See! this is a win-win.
Additonally, we’ll have various duties, but we’ve already split them up amongst the three of us. Amylynn will be in charge of driving the thing or any other vehicles since she is the designated Quill Sister driver, and Kelli and Ava are both quite skilled in maintenance tasks so what ever they come up with we’re pretty sure they can handle it. Any robotics issues we come across that we can’t handle, then we’ll just call Ava’s fourteen year-old son who totally has the robots area covered.
They are looking for bachelor’s degrees in various sciences, which Kelli has, but Ava and Amylynn think we can get our work experience as an equivilant. We’re quite sure that once they interview the three of us they’ll completely understand that we’ve got this covered. For goodness sakes, if we can learn extensive lending guidelines we can certainly handle this. Besides there’s that 2-3 year training. Which by the way, happens quite a bit in RUSSIA.
You know what else? We’re really looking forward to the “frequent travel” they warn you about.