December 14

Today was the first real winter-y day in the desert. We went all out and dug out the parkas and fuzzy boots. It was 50 degrees. That’s freezing, people. Our Alaskan friends are going to make fun of us, but we totally expect it. If we’re not here to be made fun of, we don’t know what they’d do. Go ahead, point and laugh. We can take it. We won’t be able to hear you with our earmuffs on anyway. Here are some things to amuse.

1. Gingerbread houses. Once upon a time, Amylynn decided to make a gingerbread house with her kids. That will never happen again. The pieces wouldn’t stick and the frosting got everywhere. Someone ate all the candies and then the dog ate the entire house.  No one really likes gingerbread anyway. We’re going to leave it up to the professionals from now on. These people should make gingerbread houses all year long. Follow the link and be amazed.

2. Obama says, play hockey. Mr Obama is sick of this no hockey bullshit – at least that’s the way these guys reported it. We agree wholeheartedly. Gary Bettman didn’t return our call, but he sure as hell better return the president’s. He has access to nukes. Anyway, the NHL has ruined our New Years Eve plans and we’re not having any more of it. The Alaskan friend had predicted the lockout would resolve in January. We sincerely hope he has the right of it.

3. Vacation days. As we stated earlier in the week, Bank of No Forks won’t allow us roll over vacation days so we have to use them all up
by the end of the year. That means taking vacation days for absolutely no reason. We guess we like not getting dressed and taking 2 hour lunches but still, we’d rather be in Antigua on blustery days like this.

4. Cacti wearing hats. A Saguaro in a Santa hat is how we know for sure that it’s Christmas in the desert. Otherwise, we’d wonder why the traffic is so damn awful and they keep playing that ridiculous music on the radio. Besides, everyone loves a good hat.

5. Cookie Dough. The best part of Christmas may very well be the cookies. And the dough. And the warm cookies. And the cool cookies. All of those things  are truly wonderful. You all know the absolute best part. Not sharing. You know it’s true.