Besides the holidays, the month of December is the time we use up all the vacation days we have left. “Use ‘em or lose ‘em,” Bank of No Forks says. That means we have weird random days off through the rest of the year. Like today for instance. We’re both off. Off work, not our rockers. Our rockers are perfectly fine, thank you. Amylynn’s clandestine day off was ruined by having the ten-year old girl home sick. Nothing puts a damper on a perfectly lovely “sick” day like a sick person. Selfish little kid, we say. Regardless, there were some funny things this week.
1. Epic complainers. The Sisters do enjoy a good complaint. We also seriously dislike Delta Airlines. Because of this we read with interest the story of the Minnesota Rabbi who was just kicked out of the Northwest World’s Perks program of which he was a platinum member. The Supreme Court is listening to this case and will make a decision sometime next year. Here’s the deal. He was dumped from the program for complaining too much. Everyone agrees that is the issue. What the court is deciding is whether the airline is allowed to expel him for that. We’re really hoping the answer is no. We don’t like the precedent this would set. There are a lot of places we
want to continue to go to, even though we complain. Although, we’ve never, ever complained in a bakery. Ever.
2. What the hell Seattle? When you picture Seattle we’ll bet you’re like us and you imagine some generally quiet yet caffeinated people. Apparently not. Those people are noisy. They screamed and yelled and jumped up and down so much at a recent Seattle Seahawks football game they registered a 1 or 2 level earthquake at the local seismometers. And they set a sound record at 137.6 decibles. That’s louder than you think. It’s louder than Amylynn’s house on a Saturday morning while she’s trying to sleep in.
3. Drinks are on the TSA. We read with our mouth’s hanging open how the Transportation Safety Administration has collected $531,395.22 this year alone by people who tossed their change in those bins before they go through security and fail to retrieve it. That’s a LOT of change people. Miami flyers left the most money at $39,613 and Guam had the least with $1.70. Can you freaking believe it? More than 1/2 a million dollars in coins. Holy Quarters! We wonder who rolls all that change.
4. On line Christmas shopping. We’re huge fans of Amazon. Our books are for sale there. (Please note the shameless plug – click the covers to the left to take you right to the buy screen.) But they’re also good for buying camels named Leon and shoes and if they had a panda bear on there you know damn good and well we’d have hit that buy button a zillion times already. There’s a lot to be said about the enjoyment of shopping in person, but we also LOVE getting home to packages on our door step.
5. Boys asking girls to dances. We’re all for women’s lib. Or at least equal pay and equal opportunity. OK – what we’re really into is not being told what to do. That’s not to say we don’t enjoy telling other people what THEY should be doing. Take for instance 16-year old boys who don’t think they have any cute girls at their school. We’re very happy to point out the good-looking girls and shoving our boy in their direction. Obviously, we think that girls can ask boys to the dances. After all, it was Amylynn who asked her husband to marry her, but we like it better when the boys do it. Nervous boys are cute. That’s what we say.