Have I got a Halloween story for you…

Since I’m the one who gets phone calls from my husband that say, “Come home right now!” CLICK. I think it’s only fair that he be poked awake in the wee hours with the following:

“Honey, I’m sorry to wake you up, but I’m dealing with a lot of blood here and I need your help.”

I do excel at the understatement in an emergency.

When I fed the dogs at 10:30 everyone was fine. When I went to let them in at 11:00 the back yard looked like a Halloween movie. There was blood everywhere. I couldn’t tell which dog it was coming from even as I followed the blood trail into the house. Of course, you know they were sitting on the livingroom carpet when I caught up with them. I determined it was Roscoe because he just sat there looking freaked out. Winnie on the other hand was vibrating with anxiety, practically hovering over him. I still couldn’t figure out where the blood was coming from. His whole body seemed covered with it and mud, all four feet, his chest and muzzle. I couldn’t coax him into the bathroom for better light, so that’s when I went to get My Honey.

Together we got him to the kitchen where we determined his foot was injured. I still couldn’t really see what was happening but I got a big clue when blood started spraying around the kitchen with every heartbeat. By now he was mostly immobile. Not Winnie. She hopped about, whining. I grabbed a bunch of paper towels and an old bath towel and wrapped the hell out of his leg. That’s when Jojo Kitty became so helpful. He climbed all over Roscoe and tromped around in the blood, tracking red kitty prints through the house. Really, with all the other blood everywhere, it didn’t make much difference. At least his wee prints were cute. It took over an hour to wipe down the kitchen, mop all the house tile, scrub the rug, and spray off the back porch.

$853 and fifteen stitches later, the sad doggy is home. Honestly, there’s nothing sadder than a bloodhound in a Cone of Shame. We’re down $1,500 this month alone in pet expenses. I told the rest of the animals to lay low through 2015 ’cause we’ve gone WAY over the pet portion of our budget.

We have no idea what he did to himself. I have my suspicions with this particular holiday and all.

I’m keeping a very close eye on him just to make sure he doesn’t turn into a werewolf tonight.