I think we should start another telethon ’cause this could get expensive

I’ll bet you think we sit around at Bank of No Forks and scour the internet for these ridiculous stories. It’s not true. We also read the paper and listen to the radio.

If you change the person in the next story to two women, this could totally be me and Ava.

A man in Italy was arrested this week when the police found  a tiger cub at his house. He claims he “found” it and thought he could resell it for a lot of money. That’s actually where the things differ from how the story would go if we’d been involved. We would NEVER have tried to sell the animal. In fact, we fully expect to die from the wounds we sustain from “finding” a wild animal and trying to love it.

I thought to look at this story as a training manual. Where does one go to “find” a tiger? Are they wandering around Italy and no one made us aware? What other stuff is roaming about that we’d be interested in? There are many reasons I have for wanting to go to Italy, but I honestly never thought tigers would be a part of it. Is it illegal to keep all exotic animals in Italy or just tigers? If there are tigers wandering around waiting to be found then I think you could argue that they’re domestic cats and no longer exotic.

Another question comes to mind. Are there lawyers who practice just this sort of thing – arguing the cases of lunatics like us who want to keep a camel, tiger, porcupine and a small elephant in the city limits. Google doesn’t come back with anything when I search, but maybe I’m using the wrong search criteria. If there are such people, should we keep one on retainer?

Further down you learn that they also arrested him for drug possession with intent to sell. That’s disappointing. Now his whole “found” story becomes suspect.