January 17

We’d like to say happy birthday to Michelle Obama. Turning 50 is a big deal. One of the Sisters is doing that this year and the other one is tired of hearing about it already. Is Barak being supportive or is he more like, shut up and eat your cake? Speaking of cake – one of our all time favorite topics – what kind are you having? We better not hear that it’s some sort of vegan, glutton free cake or we’re going to be seriously disappointed. We hope it’s a fabulous day no matter what kind of cake you’re eating. Maybe you’ll get a ’69 Camaro. Or a kitten. If you get the kitten, make sure you check out thing #5. Alright, here we go… 

1. Sugar. Sweet, sweet sugar. We’ve been fascinated with 3D printing ever since we heard such a thing existed. In fact, they were a Favorite Thing on June 22, 2012. Now they’ve created 3D printers that work in sugar and water, making anything you can dream up out of sugar. Can you imagine where the dessert industry is going to go with this? Imagine the wedding cake toppers they could make. We’re not exactly sure how this new technology is going to fit into our lives, but be assured that as soon as we come up with something we’ll be wanting one of these. There’s sugar involved and, if we’re lucky, cake.

2. Was the GPS recalculating? Two pilots were suspended this week for landing at the wrong airport and nearly skidding off the wrong runway which was much too short. At first glance, this seems appalling does it not? What the hell kind of pilots land at the WRONG AIRPORT? Were they drunk? What? Turns out the “wrong” airport was only seven miles away from where they were supposed to be. We can see the mistake. The Sisters get lost all the time. That’s why no one flies with us. The wrong airport is designed for little planes – you know, the kinds with propellers. Imagine the look of shock when a Boeing 737 plopped out of the sky.

3. New weight loss plan. Swedish doctors are implanting new (well, new to them anyway) wombs in women who are unable to use their own. After we got over the ick factor, we thought we’d be happy to give up our wombs. After all, we’re not using them anymore.  They’re just taking up valuable space in there. How much does a womb weigh anyway? Seven pounds or so, we speculate. Anyone interested in a gently used womb, let us know. We’d love to go to Sweden – assuming the pilots can get us to the right airport.

4. Bizarre marketing decisions. American Apparel has been known for making massive public relations blunders. If you don’t know of any, just Google it. They’re all over the place. For instance, they don’t want fat or uncool people shopping there. Then along came this week. This is truly the most bizarre idea we’ve ever seen floated. They’ve added pubic hair to their mannequins. WTF? Really. WTF? If you can answer that, then perhaps you can explain why they chose this style of pubic hair. Decidedly uncool. The whole thing is so strange we don’t even have sufficient words. Congratulations, American Apparel. We’re speechless.

5. Kick ass cat. We’ve been sitting around for months, complaining that our cats get no respect from the dogs in our house. When our cats attack them, the dogs don’t seem even a little bit afraid. Also, the cats have expressed in their non-verbal way that they would like to appear more fearsome to human visitors when they visit the house. This is communicated mostly by dismissive glances and pouting. Thanks to the internet, we have found a solution. We’re going to buy this. Granted, it’s a bit expensive at £312.38, but what price is too much for cat dignity?