March 25

It’s Good Friday which is really, really good. Because So-so Thursday was a bit of a let down and Wahoo Wednesday was crap. We have high hopes for the entire weekend. The weather will be fine for hunting eggs and any weekend rife with jelly beans has got to be good. We decided not to set a trap for the bunny this year. In the past, we figure he’d be too tired to be at the top of his game by the time he got to our house. This year we’re gonna cut him a break. Or maybe it’s that we’re just too tired to plan anything. Either way, hop on over dude. The coast is clear.

1. EEK! We’ve all had bad dining experiences. Perhaps it was the food. Maybe the waiter. It could be that the other diners were obnoxious. We’re willing to bet that you never had fellow diners this obnoxious though. A guy in Los Angeles felt the need to spend $200 on sushi before showing people his snake. This is not a euphemism for something sexual. It was an actual snake. Understandably the other diners didn’t appreciate it (probably wouldn’t have appreciated the OTHER kind of snake either) and the manager made the man and his reptile leave. He came back a few minutes later, shouted obscenities at the patrons, then threw a 13 foot python on the floor and stalked out. The police collected the snakes and arrested the man but not until after a full-blown panic engulfed the place. This is why we don’t eat sushi.

2. Next stop, Iowa. We never in a million years thought we’d be saying that we were moving to Iowa, but we’re putting it in the running. Why? you ask. Because it turns out you can own a tame, pet kangaroo if you live in Norwalk, Iowa. This all came about because the police were looking for a 3-foot-tall kangaroo that was wandering around town. The guy who owned it didn’t get in any trouble. Turns out the Roo is tame and friendly. It’s also noted the kangaroo is for sale. No news on what his name is. We like Phillip or Bosco. Now we’re just looking for a nice farmhouse in Norwalk.

3. Square donuts. It turns out that square donuts are a thing and they look especially yummy. There is a war going on in the usually peaceful donut metropolis of Indiana over these delicacies. The Square Donut bakery has been making their donuts since the 60’s. They even trademarked the name in 2013. Along comes johnny come lately in the form of Family Express who started in with the square donuts in 2005. The original company sent a cease and desist, and apparently they haven’t. Now they’re all going to court. We don’t pretend to know anything about the law, but we do know all about donuts. We’d be happy to render an opinion – using lots of adjectives and gerunds – to whichever company sends us some free donuts. Ready…Go!

4. Blue Bunny. Have you seen these commercials? They’re for Blue Bunny Ice Cream. So they made a blue bunny. Seems appropriate, right? That’s not exactly correct. They made the cutest blue bunny EVER! Look at this adorable little dude. We think it’s stunning how much this adorable bunny looks like the Girl-Who-Lives-At-Ava’s-House. Remarkable. Suspiciously accurate even. We’ll consider not suing if the Blue Bunny people send over some ice cream. You should coordinate with the Square Donut people above.

5. Another Blue Favorite. We’re big fans of Apple and Siri by default. We’re also fans of Cookie Monster and HUGE fans of cookies. This commercial is so great, it’s practically a documentary. We’ve felt like Cookie so many, many times. Hang in there, blue friend. They’ll get done eventually.