The other one sounds better

I was cleaning my desk again today.  I do that when I’m stuck on a section in the book or I’m just looking for a way to procrastinate.  I found this from a daily calendar from years ago.  I thought it was so hysterical at the time that I put it on the bulletin board over my desk and it was still there, under mounds and mounds of other stuff.

Some background information:

In 1978, Warner Bros made one of those big disaster movies that were all the rage, The Swarm, starring a huge cast: Michael Caine, Katherine Ross, Olivia DeHavilland, Richard Chamberlain, Patty Duke, Jose Ferrer, Richard Widmark, Slim Pickens, Fred MacMurray, and Henry Fonda. 

I’m sure I never saw it.  I don’t go in for horror movies – even the stupid ones.  I’m not sure why that is, exactly, since I can and will read any number of horrifying books.  Stephen King is a particular favorite of mine.  I’ve even read a number of horror books that have been made into movies and not seen the films because they’re just too scary.  I’ve read Rosemary’s Baby, The Amityville Horror, and all of King’s books and have only watched The Shining.  I might possibly have seen all of The Exorcist – but not all at one time.  That movie scares the shit out of me.  And then when they released a director’s cut – Holy Crap.  I’m totally out. 

Kelli on the other hand…  I’ll get to more of her later.

Back to The Swarm.  The movie was released in Taiwan and this is their stab at the liner notes for the DVD.

The Swarm – Monsters by the millions, and they are all for real!  Excell to take the director of the disaster condition the text, once the successfully be responsible for the Neptunian number and skyscraper conflagration of a the action in the drama part, and have to feel the elephant of the public soul with result, have the authentic fact conduct and actions the basis, persons the details that match wits also there is certain science can’t he stunt of the letter, high also increased then that penetrate everywhere.

I swear I didn’t mistype any of that.  Honestly.  I defy you to make sense of that mess.  Neptunian number?  Elephant of the public soul?  Skyscraper conflagration?  It all sounds very mystical and intriguing, doesn’t it? 

Back to Kelli and her horror movies.  Kelli has seen them all and she loves them.  Tomorrow  for Friday the 13th, she is going to an all night scream fest called Scream-o-rama at the art film house.  She’s going with other crazy friends to 12 hours of vintage horror movies.  They go in at 9pm and it’s over at 9am. 

I told her I’d have an old priest and a young priest meet her in the parking lot in the morning.  Just in case.