He may be a folk hero to the lazy

I read a newspaper article the other week that left me pondering all kinds of unanswerable questions. Here is the original story. The highlights are that this guy was arrested for trying to break into a well-known jewelry store in town by cutting a hole in the roof. The funny part is that he “got tired” and quit  and went home without taking anything, but not until after liberally sprinkling the place with his DNA.  He explained to the sentencing judge that he’d been “high (on speed at the time) and got tired and left in the middle of it.”

Perhaps I’m not completely schooled on the effects of speed, but I thought that, by the very nature of the drug, you had lots of energy. Isn’t that the point? Maybe he crashed after cutting a hole in the ceiling, disabling the alarm and phone systems, and dragging in all his heavy equipment including gloves, water bottle, jacket, circular saw, various other power and hand tools and an inspection camera with a probe and television screen.  Let’s face it, that’s a lot of crap to take to work with you every day.

He left all of that stuff in the building when he left. He never got into the safes, from what I understand. Don’t you think, if you get that far, you could hang with it for a few more minutes? At least an hour? But on the other hand, haven’t we all started a project we thought we could handle and half way through, you decide, “Oh, screw this crap” but you can’t bail out because you’re a responsible person so you finish but it’s a half-assed job and you resent it the whole time.

I know I have.

It took two years to identify the burglar because it was a property theft and, thus, low on the crime lab totem pole. Can’t you imagine the disappointment when the police finally came to arrest him after two years? I’m sure he thought he was off scott free after all that time. The police tracked him down the by the sheer tonnage of DNA evidence.

Don’t you think it would have just been easier for him to leave a note?

Hey-

I’m bushed. Give me a call at 555-5555 and I’ll come by and pick up my stuff.

Thanks,

Bozo

What’s the last project you started that you knew early on was too much? With me it’s this book writing business, but I’m clearly not well. Did you finish the project? Or did you say, “Screw it, I’m going home?”