Do you know the time zone for American Samoa? I do.

I tweeted this today. 

Sometimes, when my phone rings and his name pops up on my screen, I get excited ’cause you never know what the call will bring.

Today it was vinegar, sometimes he needs the name of some television character from an obscure 1970’s show. My uncle texted me not too long ago that my father had called him to ask about stagecoach routes.

I told him that vinegar comes directly from the bottle which is available for about a dollar at the grocery store. Honestly, it never occurred to me that vinegar was something that was manufactured. Now that I think about it, I know that it must be. Vinegar doesn’t just appear from thin air, conjured up by moms who need to dye Easter eggs.  I was curious so I googled it. There’s an actual website – www.howtomakevinegar.com. Really.

It tells me that the most common raw materials for vinegar are cane sugar juice, coconut water or nipa sap. What? What the hell is ‘nipa sap”? Wikipedia says it’s some sort of palm plant.  I also learned that it takes like two weeks or longer to ferment into vinegar. I have now lost all interest in vinegar and nipa sap. It turns out there is nothing interesting about it except the Easter eggs, but I’m willing to sacrifice those if I never have to research this again.

I have no idea how my father fills his days now that he’s been forced to retire, but I can tell you that he’s bored and that keeps me on my toes.  I hope my next assignment is more interesting than vinegar.