RIP – Nothing Deserved it More

I’m on a diet.  It’s making me mean.

That’s all.  Good night.

Just kidding.  But I am feeling a little more surly than usual.  One of the reasons can be found in the vicinity of a black 18×18 inch square in my bathroom.  It’s a dirty, filthy liar and I hate it. 

I finally had to go buy a scale.  I haven’t owned one in years.  I make it a point not to keep things around me that make me want to cry, I’m sure you understand.

So I stood in the Target a couple of weekends ago staring at an end cap with six or eight models of scales.  I bought the old fashion one – read the cheap, non-digital one.  It lasted for about 12 hours. 

I do not want you to think that I murdered this scale.  I did not.  If I want something ruined beyond belief, I call a professional “ruiner”.  His name is Bandit and he weighs a wee little 37 pounds, but he packs a big punch in his pipsqueak frame. 

I placed the scale on the bathroom floor, stood on it, cursed it out and then left it tucked between the bathtub & the toilet to rot in hell.  I walked by some hours later and found piles and heaps of stuff in the bathroom and the scale buried underneath.  Apparently Bandit weighed every single thing he could carry into the bathroom: piles of towels, rolls and rolls of toilet paper, toys, couch pillows, books, and more toys.  I do find it funny that he carted everything in there instead of bringing the scale to the various items.

I had to buy a new one.  This time I went a little more higher-end and splurged on the 24.99 model, the 7.99 having proved itself a weakling.  Really I don’t know what I was expecting of the little 7.99 version.  Things need to be heavy duty with the Bandit in residence.